here i am to overcompensate...

I like people who are genuine. I do.

Recently I have discovered it is hard to be real. Not the “knock on the table realize it is real” but the “know who to be” kind of real. There is this huge sense of I am not real if I say hello to someone I don’t want to talk to, let me divulge a little deeper into that. You run into someone you haven’t seen in a while and you say “Hey there John” they reply “Hi Barbi, how are you doing?” Shit. There you have it, they asked the dreaded question. Now the normal response most people give is to lie and say “I’m good.” Not saying you aren’t doing well or good even but it is a copout cause we have 1)convinced ourselves the “how are you doing” question wasn’t really wanting a real answer, 2)you don’t know this person so why would you answer the question truthfully and 3)are trying to end the conversation as smoothly as possibly.

Most of the time, although I acknowledge the fact that most people don’t seriously want to know how I am doing, I am going to tell them any way. Which usually is the feeling I feel at that moment which usually is me being tired so I will say, “John, I’m pretty exhausted, you?” Which is a good genuine response.

There are tons of examples like this one above I could mention. It all leads to this idea the Lord has been teaching me about OVERCOMPENSATING/OVERCORRECTING.

So if you really don’t want to know, don’t ask, right? But then now you have become that mean uninviting person no one wants to talk to. It is this crazy contradiction.

Take this church I have been visiting. I have been there about a month and not a single person has talked to me. I walk in with a friend, who is quite popular and have one of their “elders” come and converse with him and in no way include me in a conversation. Not once but twice. And now they have become the mean uninviting person I don’t want to talk to. I physically made a move and went to an open house…but what church means to me is so burnt on my brain that I cant get passed the fact that I feel unwelcome. I feel like church should be like a family (Acts 2). Aldersgate taught me that and I am spoiled. I want it.

Instead, I find post modern baptists overcorrecting what they see is a fault of their forefathers: greeters. Which brings me back to the example up top. So instead of saying, "Hi how are you," they decided against doing it, in an effort to not be fake or genuine. And there is the problem. They have made themselves more fake and less genuine because it shows no desire to do the one thing God created us for…well one of the things…Relationships. And I am not sure that I want to have a relationship with someone who can’t say "Hi" to me because they can’t be genuine.

And I am not innocent in all of this. I need to repent of my cynicism which increases with every smile that never meets mine. When I get nervous I overcompensate and ramble, now since I mentioned this you will recognize it. I was a shy child and taught myself how to be outspoken and extroverted. I overcorrected what I thought was a problem, something I thought would make people accept me more.

Sadly it doesn’t work this way. Overcorrecting leads to more problems. It does or it will. Sooner or later we will learn that being genuine, although hard is rewarding. I am praying for my friends, family, churches, you, that your heart would be opened to loving people more than yourselves. That we would no longer OVERCOMPENSATE for the sins of our fathers or ourselves but that we would live life like Jesus did. Genuinely.

I like people who are genuine. Don’t you?